After this last post I got restless. I was disappointed in the economy (as we all are, I'm quite sure) but also disappointed in myself and my decision to come here. It seemed like, perhaps, the Korean 'salad days' were behind us. I would not be sitting in the fabled 'cat-bird seat' after all. I languished through the beginning of this week, sleeping in, not going to the gym. Even daydreaming about places I could have been other than here. Then, of all times, one of me younger classes started giving me a hard time for the first time. They begin talking back with a defiant "NO" when I gave them a direction. I'd say, "Be quiet, please, I can't hear Kevin's question." and get a "You be quiet!!" right back like a bullet from a gun. There's even a kid who stares me down sometimes. "Stare ME down?!!!" I wanna scream in his flat fugly face! I was about to crack. Then suddenly, I thought hard on it today, waking up in a better mood and working out at the gym before school: "This couldn't have anything to do with me, could it? Those kids are brats, right? It's not that I've been a shitty teacher this week, is it?". Well...I was going to find out for sure. I went in to work early and organized a fail-proof lesson for the little monsters in my first period class that was fun and new and fresh. Very little book work, lots of moving around and games, games, games. I was sure that they were going to hate it. Not so... they had a blast. Gone were the snide remarks, gone was the name-calling behind my back (I'm starting to get the hang of Korean kid-speak) and the laughter had returned to take it's place. Don't get me wrong, I still wanna wring a few necks here and again. Teaching children is STRESSFUL to say the least. However, I realized beyond a shadow of a doubt that these kids can sense a defeatist attitude, even if they can't define it. Let's face facts here, as a youngster my class sent teachers to the sanitarium!!! They are nowhere near the hell-raisers we were. Plus, the curriculum is outright boring! How can I blame them for getting distracted. Half of these 'pint-sized migraines looking for a host' are HIGHLY under-medicated (ADD, ADHD, and other easily treatable conditions simply do not exist here.... yeah, right). That being said, I once again take two steps back to step forward once (the story of my life) and accept that I am NOT the teacher alone, but the teacher, the babysitter, the clown.... I am the whole fucking show. And the show must go on. With just a little effort on my part, it can be not only fun for these heathens, but memorable, as well. Here's to making it great.
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1 comment:
Do it. Make it great.
Good post. Keep it up.
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